Saturday, November 06, 2004
Meeting Mary Jane
November 21st, 2003
Did you know that April 20th has a special significance for some people? It is the national celebration of marijuana use. Although I had never heard of it until this year, apparently there is a longish recent history for this phenomena. What happens is that many people get together to smoke pot on this day, the 20th day of the fourth month, as close to 4:20 pm as possible. My stepdaughter Kira educated us on this event this year. I didn’t believe her so I looked it up online and found this reference:
“The number 420 is a euphemism describing one's support for cannabis and drug culture. The exact origin of the term is unknown, although there is much speculation, and a large number of urban legends surrounding its origin. Although dedicated marijuana smokers partake at almost any time of day, smoking at 4:20 or on April 20 has special meaning to some. Punctual and exacting smokers smoke-out at 4:20 AM, insisting that 4:20 PM is actually 16:20 (24 hour time). Many of the clocks in the movie Pulp Fiction are set to 4:20. In an episode of the show Futurama, an alternate universe where everyone is a hippie is numbered as Universe 420.”
More here…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/420_%28drug_culture%29
I never realized how ambivalent my messages concerning smoking dope had been to my kids. As a youth, I had tried marijuana a few times, but never had used regularly. As an adult, I had a friend who used marijuana regularly, so every once in a while I got to have a puff. No big deal. This all changed rather suddenly.
One evening I arrived home after a late meeting, and went to the kitchen to get a drink out of the refrigerator. I noticed a large bag in the crisper, and bent down to pull out the drawer. It appeared to be a large freezer bag full of a weed-like substance.
It was a large bag of marijuana. I could not believe my eyes, so I actually opened the bag and smelled it. Yes. I was ever so slightly familiar with this smell. There was a large bag of marijuana in my fridge. I don’t mean an ounce, or a gram, I mean about the equivalent of 6 full cups of weed.
My first reaction was shock. I took the bag out and went to find Ed. His first reaction was to say, “throw it out. just flush it down the toilet”. I was not sure this was such a good idea. What if someone in our house had decided to put a friend’s stash in storage here? I had no idea of the street value of this amount of marijuana.
My second reaction was anger. I couldn’t believe it. Who on earth would be so stupid to bring such a large amount of marijuana into our home, into my refrigerator? Who would jeopardize our family’s safety? We had four girls who might be guilty between ages 13 – 20. My detective hat was on, and I was determined to discover who the culprit was.
Although I knew that Kate had tried smoking pot and drinking alcohol in the past year, especially with her hippie boyfriend Aidan, generally she was the most level-headed of the kids and certainly wasn’t an idiot. Emma, not yet 14, was in a very judgmental, “anyone who smokes anything is stupid” phase. Not Emma… couldn’t be Emma.
Then there was Kira. Kira could be counted on to be high on any given day of the week. In fact, we had recently attempted to negotiate a weekend only use agreement so that she would attend more afternoon classes. During the winter, Kira had been caught by security guards with drug paraphernalia in her pocket when she was entering a school dance. She was hanging out with a crowd of friends who seemed to include a mix of hippy types and “ravers”. In fact, Kate had told us recently that her boyfriend had seen Kira in Montreal one night at a rave. So there was definite reason to have her high on my list of suspects.
On the other hand, this felt much more like Jo. From the time Jo was a young child, she never thought about the consequences of her actions. She made silly, impetuous decisions all the time, and she was a procrastinating lazy slob. The problem was that she actually enjoy “partying”, she didn’t smoke weed or drink alcohol. Or so she claimed.
It was then the fear clutched at me. OH MY GOD. What if, God forbid, one of them had made a deal with someone to sell all of this? I walked around the house to see who was home. Jo was asleep, Kira wasn’t home. Kate was awake, but said she didn’t know who it belonged to, but it wasn’t hers.
By morning I had discovered who the guilty party was. Jo admitted that her friend had “given” her the bag to attempt to sell it so she could make some money. She had been trying to get a job for some time and had felt pressure by me to pay rent because she was not attending school. This “friend” had tried to offer her a quick easy way to make some money. I was so upset by this choice, and voiced my disappointment to her.
We ended up talking for over two hours about the situation. I talked about the great risk she was putting herself in, not just by selling weed, but just by carrying it around. This was very different than being caught with a joint or two. The large amount alone would bring a much harsher penalty than simple possession.
“Do you realize that if you were caught carrying it, you could end up with a serious criminal record?”
“Well, I was thinking I would just sell it to friends. Or even just give it to some people”.
Jo had no idea that she could be charged with possession with intent for distribution, and that “trafficking” includes giving away marijuana. The law in Canada states that even if you simply have marijuana in your possession with the intention of selling it, you can be charged with trafficking, which carries up to 5 years imprisonment for the amount she had.
On top of this, we had a discussion about her younger siblings, Emma and Owen. For one thing, if the local children’s aid society found out that there was marijuana in our home, I could lose custody of her siblings. For another, Emma, in grade 8, could go and tell her friends at school, who might tell parents or teachers about it.
After this discussion, Jo agreed that her choice had not been wise, and she arranged to give back the bag to her friend.
It took me a long time to get over this incident. Months later, I could laugh about it and talk about it as another "silly" thing one of my kids had done.
When I did share this story with people, it was very interesting to see the range of reactions of people. At that time I was working at a community legal clinic, and when I mentioned this anecdote to some of the other legal students there, they said that they would have called the police. Obviously they didn’t have any children of their own.
Another time, when an my pot-smoking friend was visiting, I told her about what had happened, and interestingly, she decided she needed to go inside to use the bathroom... as she went into the house, I heard her calling "Jo, can I talk to you for a minute?"
Did you know that April 20th has a special significance for some people? It is the national celebration of marijuana use. Although I had never heard of it until this year, apparently there is a longish recent history for this phenomena. What happens is that many people get together to smoke pot on this day, the 20th day of the fourth month, as close to 4:20 pm as possible. My stepdaughter Kira educated us on this event this year. I didn’t believe her so I looked it up online and found this reference:
“The number 420 is a euphemism describing one's support for cannabis and drug culture. The exact origin of the term is unknown, although there is much speculation, and a large number of urban legends surrounding its origin. Although dedicated marijuana smokers partake at almost any time of day, smoking at 4:20 or on April 20 has special meaning to some. Punctual and exacting smokers smoke-out at 4:20 AM, insisting that 4:20 PM is actually 16:20 (24 hour time). Many of the clocks in the movie Pulp Fiction are set to 4:20. In an episode of the show Futurama, an alternate universe where everyone is a hippie is numbered as Universe 420.”
More here…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/420_%28drug_culture%29
I never realized how ambivalent my messages concerning smoking dope had been to my kids. As a youth, I had tried marijuana a few times, but never had used regularly. As an adult, I had a friend who used marijuana regularly, so every once in a while I got to have a puff. No big deal. This all changed rather suddenly.
One evening I arrived home after a late meeting, and went to the kitchen to get a drink out of the refrigerator. I noticed a large bag in the crisper, and bent down to pull out the drawer. It appeared to be a large freezer bag full of a weed-like substance.
It was a large bag of marijuana. I could not believe my eyes, so I actually opened the bag and smelled it. Yes. I was ever so slightly familiar with this smell. There was a large bag of marijuana in my fridge. I don’t mean an ounce, or a gram, I mean about the equivalent of 6 full cups of weed.
My first reaction was shock. I took the bag out and went to find Ed. His first reaction was to say, “throw it out. just flush it down the toilet”. I was not sure this was such a good idea. What if someone in our house had decided to put a friend’s stash in storage here? I had no idea of the street value of this amount of marijuana.
My second reaction was anger. I couldn’t believe it. Who on earth would be so stupid to bring such a large amount of marijuana into our home, into my refrigerator? Who would jeopardize our family’s safety? We had four girls who might be guilty between ages 13 – 20. My detective hat was on, and I was determined to discover who the culprit was.
Although I knew that Kate had tried smoking pot and drinking alcohol in the past year, especially with her hippie boyfriend Aidan, generally she was the most level-headed of the kids and certainly wasn’t an idiot. Emma, not yet 14, was in a very judgmental, “anyone who smokes anything is stupid” phase. Not Emma… couldn’t be Emma.
Then there was Kira. Kira could be counted on to be high on any given day of the week. In fact, we had recently attempted to negotiate a weekend only use agreement so that she would attend more afternoon classes. During the winter, Kira had been caught by security guards with drug paraphernalia in her pocket when she was entering a school dance. She was hanging out with a crowd of friends who seemed to include a mix of hippy types and “ravers”. In fact, Kate had told us recently that her boyfriend had seen Kira in Montreal one night at a rave. So there was definite reason to have her high on my list of suspects.
On the other hand, this felt much more like Jo. From the time Jo was a young child, she never thought about the consequences of her actions. She made silly, impetuous decisions all the time, and she was a procrastinating lazy slob. The problem was that she actually enjoy “partying”, she didn’t smoke weed or drink alcohol. Or so she claimed.
It was then the fear clutched at me. OH MY GOD. What if, God forbid, one of them had made a deal with someone to sell all of this? I walked around the house to see who was home. Jo was asleep, Kira wasn’t home. Kate was awake, but said she didn’t know who it belonged to, but it wasn’t hers.
By morning I had discovered who the guilty party was. Jo admitted that her friend had “given” her the bag to attempt to sell it so she could make some money. She had been trying to get a job for some time and had felt pressure by me to pay rent because she was not attending school. This “friend” had tried to offer her a quick easy way to make some money. I was so upset by this choice, and voiced my disappointment to her.
We ended up talking for over two hours about the situation. I talked about the great risk she was putting herself in, not just by selling weed, but just by carrying it around. This was very different than being caught with a joint or two. The large amount alone would bring a much harsher penalty than simple possession.
“Do you realize that if you were caught carrying it, you could end up with a serious criminal record?”
“Well, I was thinking I would just sell it to friends. Or even just give it to some people”.
Jo had no idea that she could be charged with possession with intent for distribution, and that “trafficking” includes giving away marijuana. The law in Canada states that even if you simply have marijuana in your possession with the intention of selling it, you can be charged with trafficking, which carries up to 5 years imprisonment for the amount she had.
On top of this, we had a discussion about her younger siblings, Emma and Owen. For one thing, if the local children’s aid society found out that there was marijuana in our home, I could lose custody of her siblings. For another, Emma, in grade 8, could go and tell her friends at school, who might tell parents or teachers about it.
After this discussion, Jo agreed that her choice had not been wise, and she arranged to give back the bag to her friend.
It took me a long time to get over this incident. Months later, I could laugh about it and talk about it as another "silly" thing one of my kids had done.
When I did share this story with people, it was very interesting to see the range of reactions of people. At that time I was working at a community legal clinic, and when I mentioned this anecdote to some of the other legal students there, they said that they would have called the police. Obviously they didn’t have any children of their own.
Another time, when an my pot-smoking friend was visiting, I told her about what had happened, and interestingly, she decided she needed to go inside to use the bathroom... as she went into the house, I heard her calling "Jo, can I talk to you for a minute?"
