Saturday, August 27, 2005

camping update

It is almost midnight on Saturday... we have packed the van almost entirely...
In the morning we still have to:
- fill the coolers
- get some bagels and a few other forgotten items
- stop at tim hortons
- go feed a friend's cat
- drop off zoe (she is not coming)
- get dogs into van (with me and dorothy)
- put boys into car (with dad and eric)
- have an argument (oh, never mind, we did that already tonight when eric made a negative comment about being forced to go camping!)
- drop off key to the friend who is house sitting for us (with Amelia)

p.s. I got the damn batteries today. (see previous comments under camping countdown)

Please be advised I will not be posting until September 4th.

Jesus Rises From a Watery Grave

A few days ago, I went to feed my fish in the living room and noticed that there was something wrong with the air pump, so I replaced it with the one from Owen's room. I also noticed that one of the fish was missing, the lemony gold angelfish (formerly known as Lemony), so I figured he had been eaten by the other two fish. Mind you, these fish are all pretty big now -- about 4 inches long each.

The next day, Owen informed me that the angelfish in question was floating in the top of the tank. Sure enough, the missing angelfish was dead, and I went looking for the net to scoop it out and send it to its watery grave down the toilet. Something happened though (ie. the phone rang) and I never did go back to do it.

Two days later, we were eating dinner at the dining table, and from where I was sitting I could see the tank. Suddenly I let out a scream. "OWEN! OWEN! COME HERE RIGHT NOW! LOOK AT THE TANK!"

Now everyone else at the table looked at the fish tank and didn't see anything remarkable. But Owen did. He shouted -- "OH MY GOD! THE ANGELFISH IS ALIVE!" And sure enough, the big pale yellow angelfish was swimming around the tank fairly majestically.

I explained what had happened over the past two days - - and I came to the conclusion that we should rename this fish Jesus, as he rose from the grave (albeit a watery one). Owen totally agreed that it must be a miracle from God. Owen is very attuned to these issues, unlike my other more sceptical children.

Pics from Godspell


zoe in a solo Posted by Picasa


zoe in a parable Posted by Picasa


zoe as jesus doing a song/dance with john the baptist Posted by Picasa


zoe as jesus Posted by Picasa


zoe doing a solo Posted by Picasa


zoe in the chorus Posted by Picasa


zoe in a song Posted by Picasa


zoe the piano player Posted by Picasa

Godspell



Today, we went to see Zoe perform in Godspell. She had rehearsed since Monday with a group of about 15 other youth. It was a great performance. If you haven't seen this show, it portrays the Gospel of Matthew and it was produced in the early 70's, around the same time as Jesus Christ Superstar and Hair.

It was well known for several of its songs, including Bless the Lord, By My Side and Day by Day.

Meanwhile, I did actually go to work today to try to finish up some of my "to do" lists. I am still waiting for my package from Legal Aid (which means that I can actually get paid to do legal aid work for low income people).... lots of dumb red tape around that.

Tonight Zoe and I watched Benny and Joon... a really neat movie with Johnny Depp and various other really good actors (whose names I fail to recall).

Then I spent an hour trying to figure out how to call China (without costing us a fortune). In the end I just called... and we got to talk to Sarah for about 15 minutes. Dorothy and got a great laugh when Sarah told us that she had to watch her electricity consumption now that she has to pay for her own hydro!!

So tomorrow we will actually start packing the van and see what we are missing.





Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Camping Countdown...

Things to do before we leave Sunday for our week long camping trip:

10. Buy a few items, like dishpans... ours have disappeared.
9. Find and wash Owen's clothes and lots of towels.
8. Pick up tent for Dorothy from Dan.
7. Sort out and write down a plan for Zoe for next week (mom, mel, ruth).
6. Make sure Amelia has her key.
5. Get groceries for Amelia and our trip.
4. Pack clothes, bathroom stuff, beach stuff, camp chairs...
3. Get van Saturday from marg.
2. Organize dogs stuff.
1. Don't forget a couple of good books.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Holding Our Collective Breath for 48 Hours...

Since Sarah left for China early Sunday morning, we have all been worrying about what happened to her. I knew that we wouldn't hear from her until at least sometime on Monday, and around noon, she did leave a quick message on our machine. It was heart-breaking to hear, as she sounded like she was crying, but she basically said, "I'm in China mom. I'll call back later."

So we waited and worried some more. Her dad called me several times on Sunday and Monday wondering if we had any news. I promised that I would let him know if I heard anything.

This morning I received an email from her, which basically said that everything was ok.. and that she had been very tired and anxious when she called on Monday. She was visiting a school south east of Shanghai where she might work at.

Tonight, she was online on MSN and so I got to talk to her for a few minutes. She said that the school is located in Ningpo, which is located in south east China, on the South China Sea. It is huge like a university campus and is for students aged 17 and 18 years old. She said most of the teachers are 23-25 years old. (Remember, Sarah is 19... almost 20) She said she might sign a six month contract to try it out. I asked her if she was worried about working with young adults... she said she didn't know how to handle discipline - my suggestion was the only way to "discipline" was with the use of marks. (ie. give marks for effort, participation and attitude). She also said she was embarassed about crying in front of some of the other staff as they seemed to be laughing at her. (I would bet they were laughing more in sympathy than out of meanness). She is very sensitive.

Anyway, she is happy with the residence for teachers and has made one possible friend. She said the tv is boring cause it's all in Chinese! Duh! What did she expect?

Overall we are less worried and hope it goes well for her.

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Pink Luggage



Driving home from the airport early this morning, it started pouring. Five minutes earlier the sun had risen in a blaze of glory - it looked like it would be a wonderful day. (And now it is just gorgeous out). I think the weather was reflecting how I was feeling. On the one hand, I am so happy that Sarah has finally left, on her way to a potentially amazing experience across the world. This type of thing is exactly what I wanted her to do, and yet, now that she is on the plane, fear has filled my heart.

For the first time, I think I can begin to understand when my friend Lea said goodbye to her son who was heading off to basic training in the US army. I know, going to teach English in China is not the same thing... certainly not as potentially dangerous as being sent to Iraq or Afghanistan.
But sending your child into the world on a "character building" adventure is very frightening in today's world of plane crashes, terrorists, human rights violations, slave traders, muggers and rapists.

Over the past week I have tried to remind Sarah of the potential problems and dangers she might come up against, including finding birth control (should she ever need it) and a reminder that some countries have the death penalty for drug importation (not that she uses or is involved in drugs). I am just scared to death for her health, safety and well-being, but I have tried to stay calm and supportive in hopes that my anxieties don't rub off on her.

I am normally an incredible optimist. Actually, I know that Sarah is too. One time I was reading a book called "Learned Optimism", in hopes of finding out ways to help my other kids look at life with more hope. This book had a test for kids to see their optimism level. I got Sarah to take the test, sort of my "control group". As I suspected, she had very high scores in the measurement of her positive thinking. This didn't surprise me in the least, because as a young child, Sarah was always the most happy, sparkling, sweet, friendly, "nothing can go wrong" kid. She still does go around singing most of the time. Yes, she suffers from some anxiety and mild depression occasionally, but she can snap herself out of it.

This is one of the things I was thinking about this morning. The one child that I have that is somewhat like me has left. I am surrounded by so many introverted pessimists in our house that it can be difficult. Sometimes I feel like that battery of positive energy that others here need and it is exhausting at times.

Of course, I was also thinking about how time is passing by. I realize that although I am "young at heart", I am actually "old" in their eyes, certainly approaching middle age. Am I happy with what I am doing with my own life? Pretty much. But I still wish I was on that plane with Sarah, helping her to settle into her new life, like my friends who are taking their kids to residence in a new city next week.

Friday, August 19, 2005

My Keys



One day, I found a new key chain on my keys, which says ....I "heart" Eric.... It was funny when I put my keys down on a table at Oliver's friends house. His friend's mom saw the keys and did a double take. Her sons name is Eric.

Ultimate Dessert


OK... who could resist these chocolate covered pieces of cheesecake covered with strawberies and raspberries?

Thursday, August 18, 2005

Is it Friday Yet??

It was a busy day, with a new client meeting this morning (pregnant girl about to have baby) and attendance at a settlement conference at the courthouse this afternoon.

This evening we had a quiet party for Sarah -- we ended up having pizza in as she didn't want to go out. Dad invited Phil over, since we haven't seen much of him since he moved here two weeks ago. Then we just hung around and the girls decided to watch The Fight Club. I have never seen this movie, so I watched a bit of it... I did not like it - so I left after a while.

I think the highlight of today was that I got to meet Valerie, from Living in a Minor Key at a local restaurant. It is the first time I have ever met someone that I met online since I began blogging in December. Here is how it happened... after I posted the link to my new office website, Valerie told me that her office is about one block away! So we decided we had to get together.

We even have some things in common... including both of us having a 14 year old boy that is entering grade 9 this year. I hope we get to see them some time soon!

Tomorrow I hope to spend the day with Owen and Sarah doing some errands, have lunch and maybe a movie in the afternoon. We are going to have dinner with Darby and family tomorrow night, which will be a nice relaxing way to end the week.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Update on Sarah

Yesterday I took a day off work to spend with Sarah helping her get ready for her big trip. This is some of the stuff we did.

1. bought various bathroom products, socks and underwear for her
2. bought a huge PINK (think Legally Blonde) suitcase
3. bought matching PINK tote bag and back pack for her carryon luggage
4. bought travel insurance (health coverage)
5. exchanged $496 CDN for $3000 Yuans
6. had lunch (Zoe was there too and we got Chinese food in honour of Sarah)
7. went to my office and did a Power of Attorney so I can look after her interests in Canada

It was a busy day. I think both of us are finding it hard to believe she is actually about to leave. This will be my first bird to leave the nest.

Savage Love

While on the topic of sex, the world heard with horror this week that a man was killed while having sex with a horse in Washington state. Here is some commentary from Dan Savage, from Savage Love, that I found "interesting"...

The first reports about the death by horse didn't include the exact cause of death, and like many people, I assumed the man had been fatally kicked in the head when he attempted to mount the killer horse. This was not the case. The man died, a horrified world soon learned, of a perforated colon. A perforated colon could mean only one thing: The horse was the active partner, and the dead man, a 45-year-old resident of Seattle, had literally been fucked to death.

After the news broke, hundreds of distressed Savage Love readers wrote in to ask me why anyone would want to be fucked by a horse, how that would work exactly, and how a perforated colon kills you. (A perforated colon leaks like Karl Rove on a bender, which in this case led to a fatal case of acute peritonitis.) A few people wrote in to ask if the farm was still open for business.


You know, I love reading Savage Love... you can become educated about pretty much any sex related topic by reading this column.

Sex Talk

Some of you may remember that I teach a sex ed program at our local Unitarian church. We had our first "back to school" planning meeting last night, and I am the overall coordinator this year for our JR OWL team (for grade 8 and 9 students). These kids come every Sunday morning starting in Sept. until the end of April for a 27 week course. It is 1 1/2 hours each week and covers everything from values, relationship skills, masturbation and oral sex. We do it all, including giving them practise using lots of condoms.

One of the suggestions that I made last night was to re-order the curriculum, as the book has the two sessions (Sexual Harassment & Date Rape, and Recovering from Child Sexual Abuse) stuck onto the last two weeks, seemingly like an afterthought. I wanted to move them up into the middle section where we talk about healthy relationships. As well, I wanted to move two of the other sessions to the end, one called "Sexual Decisions" and the other called "Redefining Abstinence". I felt that these two sessions are really the crux of the whole course, and get the youth to think about and discuss their own safety plan in regards to the coming years.

Anyway, it looks like we are going to try this approach and see how it goes.

Monday, August 15, 2005

Your Birthdate: October 9
Your birth on the 9th day of the month adds a tone of idealism and humanitarianism to your nature.
You become one who can work easily with people because you are broadminded, tolerant and generous.
You are ever sensitive to others' needs and feelings, and you are very sympathetic and compassionate.

Your feeling run deep and you often find yourself in dramatically charged situations.
This 9 energy always tends to give more that it gets.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Summer Fun...


Owen swimming at a friends. Posted by Picasa


Dorothy posing for the camera. Posted by Picasa


Mom, Melanie and Jennifer Posted by Picasa


Tagan checking things out. Posted by Picasa


Bailey playing cards Posted by Picasa


Sarah at Melanie's. Posted by Picasa


Dan and Zoe at her birthday party at Melanie's house. Posted by Picasa


Oliver's Birthday Party at the Lone Star Posted by Picasa

Being able to pick what you want!



Owen decided he wanted this cool side pack instead of a regular book bag (back pack). It is made of jean material (which matches his pencil case) and interestingly was located with a bunch of pink and purple packs which are obviously being marketed to girls. As well, it has embroidery on the little side pocket which looks like a heart, a hand print and a flower.

You have to understand, Owen is a very sensitive boy, who gets teased alot already at school. So I pointed out to him that some might think that this pack is for girls. He thought about it and then said... "That's ok... if anyone says anything, I can always say its a hand-me-down from my sister". He REALLY wanted this pack. (and he thinks it is way cool)

We also got him some new shoes (which look like bowling shoes), 2 t-shirts, mechanical pencils, erasers, scissors, markers and a sponge bog garbage can.

People Update

Sarah - leaves for China a week from tomorrow... she is flying to Shanghai through Vancouver. We are figuring out her travel money, her luggage this week. Plus a farewell event of some kind.

Dorothy - studing hard for her final exam for her Canadian Literature course - the exam is on Monday!


Eric - Gone back to work this week after three weeks of so-called "holiday".

Zoe - has finally decided to see some of her friends - which is probably a good idea as school is in a few weeks.

Owen - very bored re: staying home... which is probably a good thing what with school looming. We went shopping today for his back to school stuff.

Amelia - working full time hours and grumbling about it when we do see her. I bought her a bunch of soups that she likes and put them on her bed to cheer her up. Plus we let her have a double bed which is pretty nice.

Oliver - went to Montreal with his mom for the weekend to visit Elizabeth (the older sister). Hopefully it will go ok. I am trying to get him registered at Glebe before school starts in Sept.

Dad - seems to be pretty happy these days. He is going out to play pool with Dan and Phil tonight.

Phil - (my younger 21 year old brother who just moved here, staying with Dan)... GOT A JOB! Congratulations Phil!

Oscar (aka that darned PUP) - does not seem to grasp the concept of toileting outside. But he is still very young so I am trying not to vent my frustration towards him. Thank God he is still cute.

Friday, August 12, 2005

But seriously...

I have a couple of dilemmas... if anyone out there has some advice, tell me what you'd do:

Problem A -

At my grandfather's funeral in June, I met a distant relative (my mom's cousin) who lives far away. We exchanged email addresses and she emails me several times a week, which I can deal with. The problem is that often the emails she sends me are downright offensive to me - often racist in nature. So far, I just don't respond to these messages. What really bothers me is that she trumpets the factc that she is a "born again Christian" and is always preaching... but I don't find her emails very "Christian". Should I tell her that I don't appreciate her sense of humour?

Problem B -

I went out the other night with my daughter, her friend, and her friend's father to see a movie. When he found out that I was a family law lawyer, he asked me if I could help him with some information as he separated from his wife in the fall. What's the problem? His wife (whom I have met a few times through the girls) emailed me today asking me for legal help. It is clear by our law society rules that I can't represent two people in the same case, but more problematic is that while I don't know either of them well, they are both parents to one of my daughters friend..... Should I help them?

Any suggestions welcome!

Chuckle of the Day

This was found at Valerie's site:

Overheard standing in line behind two men at the local Zeller's:

"Has Tammy had her baby yet".
"No, they said they'll let her go until the 19th and then they'll seduce her"

I laughed until I cried....

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Euchre Night

Tonight we played euchre for about 4 hours! Dad, Zoe, Eric and I. We taught Zoe how to play and kept rotating partners. Zoe did really well. It was lots of fun.

Otherwise, I had another pretty good day at work. Got a few things done, like learning how to bill clients. When you are a lawyer, you have to bill clients before you can get any money.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Website Up

My brother Dan is working on the new website for my new office. It's early yet, but this is the address...

The Island

Tonight Zoe and I went out for dinner and a movie with a friend of hers (and her dad). We went to see "The Island". I had heard that it got mediocre reviews, but we really liked it. I would give it an 8 out of 10. If you liked the Terminator movies, the Maitrix, I, Robot... it's along those lines. Lots of interesting questions brought up, especially about human rights.

new clients...

hurray! I got some real clients today... (who say they will pay me) and more booked for tomorrow... hopefully this trend will continue...

plus... I led a workshop this afternoon at another program for teen girls... it went very well and the word is spreading that I will do free legal clinics for teens... yikes!

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

New Product Being Advertised to Women

On the news tonight there was this report about Seasonale, a new birth control option which eliminates your monthly periods. The way it works is the same as regular birth control pills, leaving women with 4 periods per year.

Interestingly, the choice of giving women 4 periods per year was done through market research. Apparently women's responses to marketing were most positive for the number 4, but not because there is any health benefit for this number.

This pill is very controversial. Women of all ages are reacting very differently. Some think it is amazing to be able to live without getting the monthly visit, while others think it is a plot to control women's bodies, let alone make more money from women's bodies by drug companies.

For me, one serious concern is that there is no evidence that the long term effects of this drug won't hurt women in the long run. They have short term studies, but no more than two years.

Monday, August 08, 2005

Keep On Working...

I seem to have this knack for talking people out of hiring me. Today, I had at least 5 messages on my desk for potential cases to work on. I spent the morning calling them... The problem is that once I hear their sad tales, I usually end up telling them how to solve their own problems... (aka... "you don't really need a lawyer, you just need some backbone...")

For example, there is a person who is having trouble with a neighbour. In another case, a woman is trying to convince her ex-husband to create a separation agreement without going to court. In another, a retired person wants to move in with someone but is afraid they will put their assets at risk.

I usually try to go through their options with them and refer them to counseling or something.

Of course, I tell them that if they discover they need a lawyer in the end, they can call me back... but meanwhile, I guess I should be convincing them that they DO in fact, need a lawyer and booking them in for an appointment...

I am not really a salesperson... and am used to being a social worker... (ie. getting people to help themselves solve their problems). This is going to take some getting used to.

Sunday, August 07, 2005

adventures at the cottage...



Every year for more than 15 years, we have visited Margaret and David's cottage, located on Loon Island, on the Big Rideau river. This river is part of the Rideau Canal system, which goes from Ottawa down to Kingston. One of the highlights of this visit was taking a boat trip through a lock to visit Westport, which is a place I know well, as I go there each summer with my mom. This time we all got icecream, and some groceries to take back to the cottage.

The food was great, with most people pitching in to cook and/or clean up. We had chicken quesadillas, plus I got to make that non-tomato salsa again, which was wonderful. Another day we had home made spaghetti sauce with pasta.

We helped a bit with the tree clearing project - several years ago, when the great Ice Storm hit Ontario, many trees were killed... Margaret and David have been working for years to clean up the dead trees so as to lower the fire threat to the island's forest. The island must be at least 8 acres... ??? It takes about 40 minutes to walk around the island.

We have had many adventures on that island... my best memories are canoing, including tipping the canoe about 6 years ago during a thunder/lightning storm. We have had many birthday parties there, and this year it was Oliver's turn. We had his actual birthday at Loon Island this year. The boys had a great time basically swimming anytime they wanted from dawn until dusk...

Another fun thing to do there is play games... we played euchre, carcosonne, settlers of catan, skipbo, crib, set, and honour.... at some point or another. Also, Owen and I collected some nature stuff for his collection to take to the Nature Museum to trade in, including: birch bark, pine cones, a rock, fungus, bones, feathers, mica, porcupine quills.

Sights and Sounds...


Each morning at the cottage, Owen and David would wake up around 7 am... they headed out to Kayak around the islands... one morning they saw a weasel! I showed Owen this picture and he said it looked just like this. Apparently weasels are quite nasty little creatures who eat lots of other animals. Of course, we heard and saw many loons, as well as hawks, turkey vultures, sea gulls and various other birds.

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Off to the Cottage!

Eric, Dad, Owen, Oliver and I are heading off to our friend's cottage for the next three days. We have been going here for about 15 years... it is on an island... on the Big Rideau River... it is very exciting as we have to drive for 1 1/2 hours and then go by boat for 20 minutes.

Once there, we can swim, canoe, hike, read, play lots of games and just relax. I can't wait to get away from the stress in the city. It will be nice to spend time with our friends too.
Have a great weekend!

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Chaos - Thriving Under Pressure



The past week has been very stressful and chaotic. While I generally thrive under these conditions, Eric, basically an introvert, does not enjoy this type of environment. Poor Eric is on "vacation" (for the past two weeks) and yet he has been having panic attacks because of his ex-wife being in town in a tizzy about Oliver's decision to live with us for the upcoming school year.

After much weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth, it was decided to invite her and her friend to attend a big birthday dinner for Oliver at a local restaurant (The Lone Star) for fahitas and ice cream cake. Oliver will be 14 tomorrow, but we will be away at a friends cottage by then so we decided to celebrate yesterday. His mom did show up eventually, which made 16 people. It went pretty well -- she basically didn't speak to me or Eric and we sat at the other end of the table. My kids and my dad sat in the middle section, then Eric's kids all sat with their mom at the other end. After the dinner, cake and presents, Oliver walked back to our house with his mom so they could have a talk and apparently it went ok. He was very happy to have the initial talk over with. It sounds like she will move back to Ottawa in the fall, so although Eric is not happy about having her around, at least it will cost less!

We did have some fun over the weekend - we saw friends for a bbq and games night on Sunday. Then on Monday, we went to Melanie's (my sister) for a belated family get together for Zoe's birthday (she is 15 now). I brought all the food because our house is not very child proof these days... and we had kebabs, salad, rice and a cheesecake for dessert. The food was a big success!

As well, we were babysitting Anouk, a chocolate lab who is 4 years old for the weekend. She did very well and gets along with both Suki and Oscar.

Today I am at the office and tonight we have to pack for the cottage as we leave tomorrow.

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